2 posts tagged “canal”

Power Lines

Attempting to transfer the canine unit from point A (our house) to point B (canal trails) isn’t an easy task in my neighborhood. In less time than it takes for Snow to hike his leg and write his name in calligraphy, he has every dog within a two block radius howling like a demented hoard of banshees. I keep my head down and focus on the sidewalk, mentally beating the dog about his head and neck because in all reality, it’s his fault the other dogs are behaving as they are. Snow is an instigator, a taunter of those who are caged or tied. As we reach the canal, it’s a must for the canine unit to read his pmail and send some in return.

Sending Out A Pmail

I’ve discovered that Snow is obsessed with holes and tunnels. If it’s large enough to accommodate his head, then by God, it’s going in.. I’ve warned him against such odd & disturbing practices. I fear that one day, he’ll jam his head down the wrong hole and some deranged, tunneling mutant will get all up into his grill (Yes, a 40 year-old woman just used the phrase: “all up into his grill.”), grab him by the furry lips and before he can escape, will remove his teeth with a pair of deranged, tunneling mutant needle-nosed pliers. How’s that for a run-on sentence? Screw you, English teacher.

Snow Investigating A Ground Hog Hole

Word: Cats or dogs bounding towards you is normal, in a domesticated-animal-like sort of way. Groundhogs who bound towards you means one of two things: Either you caught one off guard and you’re standing between the critter and his crib…or…he thinks you look like a hot patootie in your worn out jeans and “I Voted For Bill The Cat” t-shirt and wants to climb up your leg and insert his manhood in any available orifice. Whereas then, I would suggest running like Jason Voorhees himself was after you.